THINGS couldn’t be going much better for the English against the Aussies out on the cricket field, so Vibe decided to pit the two countries’ cuisines against each other.

I baked some beautiful Lamingtons – an Australian delicacy of sponge cake in chocolate and coconut – according to a triple-tested authentic Aussie recipe and asked my colleagues to test and compare them to the beloved English favourite, the scone.

Some people claimed they are not like for like, but nor are Shane Watson and Alistair Cook yet both open the batting for their country.

It is the same here: brash and prickly versus smooth and conservative, let the best baked good win.

Just as the cricket has so far proved to be a one-sided contest, so was Vibe’s very own Ashes bake-off.

The Lammos didn’t go down well.

“Scones with jam and fresh cream on a Sunday afternoon with high tea are delightful, something to impress the in-laws," said media consultant Mary Chambers. "If I bought out Lamingtons I would feel like a bit of a cheap tart that shops in poundland.”

Nicola Harris added: “You can’t compare them to a scone. It’s like comparing a camel and a car. They are very dry.”

“It’s a cheap knock off of a Snowball - dry and tacky, definitely does not compare to a scone,” said Bexley media consultant Sam Farrow.

My editorial colleague Robert Fisk said: “It will take forever to get all the coconut out of my mouth.”

He recommended either getting rid of the coconut or adding icing in the middle, an invention he dubbed the Fiskington.

Only new north Kent recruit Jade Bushell reckoned the Lamington was a rival to the scone, but she couldn’t eat the whole thing because it was too dry – the equivalent of a rain-affected draw with refunds all round.

Standing in the way of an English whitewash was deputy news editor, Alan Woods, who scoffed a handful of the blighters and declared: “I don’t like scones, end of story.”

The result: A resounding English victory, much like the second test.